أم بدرية

"يا سعيييد واد يا سعيييد.. إجرى روح لرأفت ع القهوة.. قوله خالتك أم بدرية عاوزاك تيجى الصبح الساعة 8 بالتوك توك توديها البوسطة!".

 رأت أم بدرية سعيد ينظر لها من أسفل ثم يعدوا مسرعًا ويخرج من الحارة الضيقة إلى الشارع حيث توجد القهوة.. كانت تجلس على السرير الموضوع أسفل شباك حجرتها الوحيد والمطل على الحارة الصاخبة المتفرعة من شارع الناصرية بحي السيدة زينب.. أسندت رأسها على قائم السرير الخشبى وهى تتأمل بعض الشقوق الجديدة التي ظهرت على سقف الحجرة المستطيلة ليمتلئ السقف شاهق الارتفاع بالشقوق الطولية والتي يظهر بعضها العوارض الخشبية المستخدمة في بناء المبنى العتيق الذي يتكون من ثلاث طوابق.. كل طابق مقسم إلى ثماني حجرات صغيرة تسكنها ثمان أسر يشتركون جميعًا في حمام واحد بكل طابق.. والذي ظل قائمًا على الرغم من مرور ما يقرب من المائة عام على بنائه.. قضت منهم أم بدرية معظم سنوات عمرها الذي يقترب من الثمانين.

  تحسست أم بدرية جبهتها الممتلئة بالشقوق ثم نظرت لنفسها في المرآة الصدئة الصغيرة ذات الإطار البلاستيكى الأخضر المعلقة على الحائط و هي تقارن الشبه بين شقوق وجهها و شقوق سقف حجرتها التي تبقى فيها وحيدة بعد سفر بدرية إبنتها مع زوجها للعمل بالخارج.. لا تخرج من حجرتها إلا مرة واحدة شهريًا.. تذهب فيها لصرف الحوالة البريدية التي ترسلها ابنتها أول كل شهر.. فيما عدا ذلك تبقى أم بدرية بحجرتها و تعتمد على بعض جيرانها الذين يقضون لها حوائجها و طلباتها.

   تكره أم بدرية الخروج من حجرتها.. تكره الخروج لمكتب البوسطة تحديدًا، على الرغم من انتظارها للحوالة البريدية -التي لم تُرسل منذ شهرين- بفارغ الصبر لم تدفع خلالهما إيجار الحجرة و كادت أن تتضوّر جوعًا لولا مساعدة الجيران.. إلّا أنها تتوتر و تصاب بالذعر عندما تتذكر ضرورة الذهاب إلى مكتب البوسطة.. لم تكن سلالم المبنى ذا الثلاث طوابق شاهقة الارتفاع هو سبب المشكلة.. فهي تهبط و تصعد السلم على مهلٍ.. وتجلس لتستريح من حين إلى آخر.. لم يكن مكتب البوسطة بعيدًا.. ودائمًا ما يوصلها رأفت شقيق زوج ابنتها بالتوك توك إلى هناك.. وينتظرها على أول الشارع المقابل لمكتب البوسطة القابع على الطريق العمومي و يعيدها مرة أخرى.. شئ واحد كان يؤرق أم بدرية و يصيبها بالذعر.. شئ واحد كانت تكره المشوار لأجله.. شئ واحد كان التفكير فيه يصيبها بالأرق كل ليلة تسبق ذهابها لمكتب البوسطة ويطرد النوم من عينيها.. هذا المشوار اللعين لايعوقه إلا شيئًا واحدًا يتمثل في سؤال واحد يظل يتردد برأسها طوال الليل ليتحول إلى تساؤلات عديدة عن فرص عودتها سالمة.. عن فرص بقائها على قيد الحياة حتى تعود إلى حجرتها مرة أخرى.. لتعود كل التساؤلات ثانية إلى سؤال واحد يفرض نفسه داخل رأسها بقوة..

"لما أنزل من التوك توك وسط الزحمة و العربيات دى كلها.. هاعرف أعدى الشارع ولا لأ...؟!!".

أيمن عبد الجواد

Determination

• NEVER compare yourself to others! You won't go anywhere if you're gonna compare yourself to others,the only thing you can compare yourself to is your past accomplishments and your future ones. If there's progress,then you should feel happy about yourself! 

• Never mind anyone doing the same thing as you,same goal,different motives. 

• Make sure the goal you're reaching is something worthy and lasts for a lifetime!

• Make sure the goal you're reaching is something to be proud of!

• Don't build your goals on false hopes or results like wealth,women,etc.. If you're going after something,you have to make what you want clear for yourself,use a paper and a pen if you have to! But DON'T EVER LIE to yourself! If you're going after a certain job just for the money you'll be paid for it and you don't even like it,you'll fail and you'll get bored Soon!

• Be ready for lots of ups and downs in your life. 

• Rest assured that God has the perfect thing for you in the end. 
• You gotta love what you're doing in order to succeed!  

These are not essential steps that you HAVE TO go by them but I'm just clarifying what I usually do in my life and that's the reason that pushed to write the whole blog! To share my personal experience which I find really comforting!

Maybe the whole article isn't clear but the following two REAL stories will do the whole job:

Vincent Van Gogh:

   Born in 1853,Van Gogh belonged to a rich family that took picture trading business as a profession in Europe. Back at his time,that kind of work is like movie producing nowadays. Rich and popular. However,due to some financial problems,Van Gogh was forced to drop out of school and work in London in his Uncle's company,but he soon got bored of all the 'classic' paintings he used to sell for the people.    One day,he was roaming around a village and sat on a rusty iron wheel to rest and it happens that he saw a miner coming out of a mine,all covered in black and tired but yet the miner is coming out,hands in pockets. Van Gogh got a pencil and a paper to draw that scene and another drawing of another miner coming out. When he got back home,he put both drawings infront of him to redraw them in which it took him a very long time and in the end he tore the drawing for not liking it.  Van Gogh suddenly felt that he should draw! He used to go to the mine every single day to look at the miners there and draw what he saw and sometimes he had to tear some drawings again! But this time,he managed to hold on to drawing as his new hobby and job! Vincent grew more confident and believed in himself. He started dedicating his time to art lessons,books and he even got into an arts college!   Although he died at a very young age with a few paintings,his paintings were considered priceless and rare!

Bill Gates:

• "I'll be a millionaire by the time I'm 30,I can do anything I can put my mind into" -Bill Gates to his school teachers. 
   Bill found out about his passion towards programming during his early educational stages and he started writing computer programs at the age of 13 when he met his partner Paul Allen who shared with him his passion!   The two young partners knew that the upcoming age is an age of technology and information,therefore,they established a company and Bill wasn't older than 14!    Bill went to Harvard college and during his studies,he developed a copy of the 'Basic' programming language. The real thing blasted in 1974 along with Paul Allen where they developed a basic programming language which was a turning a point in laptops! The beginning of 'Microsoft'. Bill Gates was a manager by the time he was 21.    Bill Gates managed to KILL EVERY SINGLE THOUGHT that big ideas come only from philosophers and academics achievements. He is the modern technology miracle! 

   When we look at those two and then back to ourselves,we aren't much different than them,you know. They both lived in different centuries and they both found their passion and what they want to do in their lives and they never moaned about any ups or downs in their lives! They started working right away to achieve their goals. 

On your knees | علي ركبتك

-The key to having a moving on-life lies in the bottom of 'getting your thoughts organised' sea, and you might be wondering why I've called it a sea, and that's because being organised isn't just a small thing, it isn't arranging your clothes according to their colours but it also includes arranging your thoughts according to your life. I strongly believe that we control our lives with every single detail and life-event going on within itself. It's by your own choice how you decide to spend your life and amazingly, most of us, if not deliberately, choose to have it the hard way. Why have it the hard way when you can live it the easy way? Why do we tend to drown in our negative thoughts and not-happening life scenarios? Honestly, this is just normal and it's totally fine but the real question here is, Do you let these scenarios control you? A simple thought to decide your future, and how you're going to live? Seriously? Oh heck no! Can't you see it? Can't you see how simple it is? Everything flips upside down depending on how you look at it?

 At my school, they used to teach us this autobiography written by a famous Egyptian writer called 'Taha Hussein', who was blind. This guy was raised in the countryside among many other kids as his father had 2 wives. At a later stage of his life, he lost his grandfather,grandmother,sister and older brother in one year. The year after, he travelled with his oldest brother to Cairo in order to begin his studies at Al-Azhaar,he's blind. The young boy grew up to be a Nobel-prize winner and one of the greatest writers ever happened in our Egyptian history. He grew up teaching us that our past depends on how we print our present, and our future depends on how we look at our present. He used to be that blind boy who couldn't feed himself and whose brother took him by the hand to where he studied. It's so amazing to see real people with real life obstacles who managed to achieve their dreams by forgetting their past and giving much of their effort into the present. Let me tell you something, you can be one of those people, maybe not a Nobel-prize winner, but a real life problem analyzer and solver. 

 -Giving much thoughts about what's useless for you will drift you away from putting your eyes on the real prize which is dealing with more important events going on in your life. Growing up, we have to understand the meaning of 'time management' and that it doesn't only apply on our actions, but our thoughts. Different people yet similar events which make us all the same to each other, but hey, God didn't give you a brain to ignore its use, or misuse it, He made you special by giving you the ability to 'think' and 'evaluate'. To think and evaluate what you've got in your present life. To think and evaluate why you're on your knees right now! We tend to make a big deal out of anything and we're the type of people who lie and believe themselves later on. No! No! I want to tell you that every single race you're running now depends on how you see the track you're running in. Some people succeeded in seeing that track a short and easy one which they can easily run while others were like:'Oh man, I gotta run aaaallllll this!' Isn't that just remarkable? I mean, you don't understand the power you got in yourself! And I'm talking to each and every single individual out there, YOU GOT THIS IN YOURSELF. Only you can realise the beauty of dedicating your thoughts to building your life instead of wrecking it. Remember, it's only by the present you decide how your life goes and no matter how bad or good your past was, I'm telling you, YOU, and only YOU, have the power and ability to rise again from the ashes of your past, determined and grateful. Grateful to your past, that made you what you are today, and let you know that it doesn't matter what happened to you but what matters is what you'd allow to happen later on!

Past Vs Future

Past:

Something good,bad or both happened which either had an impact on your life or on others'. Of course if something good happened with a good impact,it would be awesome to keep it forever in the future. I'm talking about an obstacle in your past that you can't overcome,something that prevents you from moving forwards with you life,maybe a breakup,a fight,death or loss. They all form a huge block in your running track and to be honest,you'll get over whatever faces you in your past but the trick lies in whether you want to climb that brick or jump directly over it and keep running?

Most of you keep thinking about what happened and how it could have happened or maybe how I would have changed or even prevented it from happening. Most of you blame themselves. Most of you cry. Most of you give up on the silliest things just because of that. Some of you find life unbearable to live anymore!

Let's change this negative attitude a bit. So,a certain event took place and it does have an impact,and if you're gonna think about it,you're fooling yourself because neither thinking NOR crying will help you move on. We all cry because of something but it's not about now,you see,it's about what will be of a good use for the future. Let me tell you a story of a brave boxer that may not appeal to you much:

   A famous American Professional boxer who won the world heavy weight championship at a young age and with total record of 56 wins was having an important boxing match coming up in a couple of days and he was getting ready for it,along with his training staff and coach,you know,the regular workouts for boxers,it aches me to write this story as I'm a weak fella.    However,he got the most unfortunate call back from his hometown informing him of his father's death and that the funeral will be held the day before the match at which this boxer's presence should be noticeable. Yes,he was sad and oh yes,he did cry but soon,on the very same day,he decided that he won't be attending the funeral and he said that his father was one of the dearest to his heart and he loved him the most,he didn't attend the funeral but instead he continued his training for his upcoming match. 

What would you call this? Some of you will say:"What a fool,his father is dead and he's training?" Others will say:" What a brave man!" And even others might say:"Hahahaha,a boxer crying.."

What people say doesn't matter and although he's famous,he never cared what the press would publish about such a story. This boxer knew the true meaning of Past Vs future concept,his father died and attending his funeral won't make him live again,he knew he lost a huge part of his life and he did show his sorrow but he soon overcame it and came back to himself wondering if this would affect his match the following day. He accepted his past and knew he can't change it,instead,he has put his eyes onto the real goal of his life. 

Read this story over and over again,do you want to be like this boxer? Careless about what others will say about you and with absolute self-trust,overcoming your past? 

Don't you ever think that your past will prevent you from moving,because actually,you do have the power and you do allow the past whether to prevent you or not! You control where and when you want to overcome your past to live a happier and fruitful life,and I suggest to start RIGHT NOW! Give up on your past,you gave it enough of your time already and please focus on what's coming up ahead of you! Life has got much lemons to give and if you didn't finish your past lemonade,I'm telling you,you'll have to drink all of it in a moment.

Freedom

   What was the first thing that came to your mind when I mentioned the word 'freedom'? Did you think about some kind of a bondage? A certain struggle that's keeping you from proceeding on with your life? Today, we're here to break these chains and to set you free from every single struggle that you might think it's nearly impossible to keep going on. 

   

  The past is gone and you can't change what happened but then what? Are you just gonna Stand there shaking and afraid to act?  Focus. Know what you can do and do it. You control your life and you decide when to snatch your life back! Don't focus on whatever bad happened to you! Focus on your life plan! You're the only one with the power to allow something to hurt you!

  Positivity plays an important role here when it comes to life's challenges and when you feel you're down on your knees and as I'm someone whose trust is easily shaken,I'm going to show you how I use such situations to build my character.
 
   Trust yourself. If you can do something,you'll do it. Period. Can you get over your trouble in just one hour? Yes? Have you just said yes? Then yes you can do it! Inject positive abilities! Success! Don't ever suspect yourself or your ability to do something because believing in yourself will help you move! Yesterday,I heard someone talking about faith or 'to believe' and the whole point was that you SHOULDN'T TRUST ANY ACTION OR RESULT,instead,you put your blind trust in someone! Of course,God is number one! Then comes your whole social life! Friends, family,and finally,you! Don't convince yourself that this isn't enough just because you haven't tried it!

   Failure and experience! You haven't truly lived until you have tasted failure. Failure is a double-edged weapon which can bring you experience or total ignorance. Good news! You get to use this weapon! You choose which side you want to hit with! You lose if you DO NOT try. You won't lose if you failed! Not at all! Keep going on as if failure and impossible are just words! And they are! Experience shapes you and shapes your future! Positively and negatively and it comes you to on how you want to be experienced! Weaker or stronger?

DON'T GO THROUGH LIFE BUT RATHER GROW THROUGH LIFE. 

What most people don’t know is that possibly the best basketball player to ever play the game of basketball, Michael Jordan, failed throughout his journey. He was cut from his high school basketball team and was extremely devastated from his coaches decision. However, instead of retrieving to discouragement and give up, he did what successful people often do; he used this event as motivation to practice harder and make the team the following year, ultimately this served to later propel him to become one of the greatest ever. This failure actually helped Michael Jordan excel as it fueled and maximized his drive to succeed. Many claim, if it wasn’t for being cut from the high school team, he may not have made the NBA, let alone become the best player to play the game.

   Don't be frustrated if you didn't get what you wanted or hoped for! A great lesson I learnt in my life was to live without expectations because the more I expect and the less I get,trusting myself will no longer have any value to me. Expectations are for the future and since you don't know the future,you should let them down. Living without expectations is living freely WITHOUT NEGATIVITY. 

   Tolerance! Don't be afraid! You won't have a one shot success. Loads of people have been through a lot in their lives and worked in jobs they didn't like just stepping stones for their big plan. It's like 'Do what you like' vs 'Like what you do'. Why not both? If it's something intolerable but essential for a future purpose,I guess you should start forcing yourself to like it and when you get to that future purpose,I suggest doing your best at it! 

Bavly Olwy